{"id":657,"date":"2017-01-23T03:30:44","date_gmt":"2017-01-23T08:30:44","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/marriagekidsandmoney.com\/?p=657"},"modified":"2022-08-08T10:01:38","modified_gmt":"2022-08-08T14:01:38","slug":"how-to-make-a-stay-at-home-mom-feel-appreciated-in-1-week-2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/marriagekidsandmoney.com\/how-to-make-a-stay-at-home-mom-feel-appreciated-in-1-week-2\/","title":{"rendered":"How to Make a Stay-at-Home Mom Feel Appreciated in 1 Week"},"content":{"rendered":"\r\n<p><iframe loading=\"lazy\" style=\"border: none;\" src=\"\/\/html5-player.libsyn.com\/embed\/episode\/id\/5015681\/height\/90\/theme\/custom\/thumbnail\/yes\/direction\/backward\/render-playlist\/no\/custom-color\/3a91a9\/\" width=\"100%\" height=\"90\" scrolling=\"no\" allowfullscreen=\"allowfullscreen\"><\/iframe><\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p>Being a Stay-at-Home Mom can be incredibly difficult. Long days, no contact with adults and repetitive tasks that feel like rearranging the deck chairs on the Titanic can make you lose your marbles. Yes, it is incredibly rewarding and you develop an unbreakable bond with your children, but raising small kids can be physically, mentally and emotionally draining.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p><!--more--><\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<div class=\"wp-block-image wp-image-705 size-medium\">\r\n<figure class=\"alignright\"><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"wp-image-705\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/marriagekidsandmoney.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/01\/stay-at-home-mom_infographic_2016.png?resize=300%2C219&#038;ssl=1\" alt=\"\" data-recalc-dims=\"1\" \/>\r\n<figcaption>Source: Salary.com<\/figcaption>\r\n<\/figure>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p>According to Salary.com in 2016, on average a Stay-At-Home Mom works <a href=\"http:\/\/www.salary.com\/2016-mothers-day-infographics\/\">92 hours per week<\/a>\u00a0and assumes <a href=\"http:\/\/www.salary.com\/Media\/Mom-Salary-2016-breakdown.pdf\">31\u00a0different roles<\/a> including cook, nurse, psychologist, housekeeper, day care teacher, laundry operator and driver. If you had to put\u00a0a value\u00a0on all of those hours worked and roles taken on, this would be a\u00a0<a href=\"http:\/\/www.salary.com\/2016-mothers-day-infographics\/\">$143,102 annual salary<\/a>.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p>Sounds like a hefty six figure salary, but it doesn't surprise me in the least. My wife Nicole is a stay-at-home Mom.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Should I Stay or Should I Go?<\/h3>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p>After our\u00a0son Calvin was born in 2014, Nicole and I had a decision to make about what we should do for child care when her maternity leave was over. Before Calvin was born, we were both driving all around town during the week to drop off and pick up our 2-year old daughter\u00a0Zoey at day care or with our incredibly generous parents who watched her during the week. (Shout out to Grandma Hana and Grandma Cindy!) After analyzing the pros and cons, we decided two kids in this frantic situation just wouldn't work. We'd rather decrease our overall take home pay than continue the way we were going. We decided together that it made the most sense for Nicole\u00a0to stay at home with the kids instead of going back to work.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<div class=\"wp-block-image wp-image-727 size-medium\">\r\n<figure class=\"alignright\"><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"wp-image-727\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/marriagekidsandmoney.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/01\/Zoey-and-Calvin-2016.jpeg?resize=300%2C200&#038;ssl=1\" alt=\"\" data-recalc-dims=\"1\" \/>\r\n<figcaption>Zoey (4) and Calvin (2) in 2016<\/figcaption>\r\n<\/figure>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p>Fast forward to today &#8230; Zoey is turning 5 in a couple of weeks and Calvin\u00a0is pushing 3.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p>We absolutely adore these kids. Out of everything in our lives, these two bring us the most joy. They make us smile, they make us laugh and they help us to not take life too seriously.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p>On the other hand, they can make our marriage very difficult. When Nicole has had a particularly rough day at the house, she\u00a0wants to talk to me about it. And the constant interruptions from our kids, make the bad\u00a0day even worse. Just last week, the frustration got so bad that we ended up taking it out on each other. Fingers and\u00a0accusations went flying and we were both\u00a0left more disheartened than before.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p>When the dust settled and I had a moment to think by myself, I realized that\u00a0I needed to try harder to empathize with my wife's current situation. I thought about the 92 working hours per week, the 31\u00a0difficult\u00a0roles and no adult interaction. At least at my office, I can take breaks, eat lunch and go to the bathroom without a 2-year old staring at me. My wife does not have these luxuries.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p>At that moment,\u00a0I challenged myself to go out of my way to make my wife feel more appreciated. I thought about what I could do each day for the next week to show Nicole that I love her, I appreciate her and I recognize the sacrifice she is\u00a0making for this family by being a Stay-at-Home Mom.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p>Here's what I came up with and how it went&#8230;<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\">How to Make a Stay-at-Home Mom Feel Appreciated in 1 Week<\/h3>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span style=\"color: #ff6600;\">Day 1: \u00a0Date Night<\/span><\/h3>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p>When the toddlers have taken over\u00a0city, its time to flee\u00a0the madness. At least for a night. We decided that even though we weren't in the best of moods after our argument that dinner and movie couldn't hurt.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<figure><iframe loading=\"lazy\" style=\"border: none; overflow: hidden;\" src=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/plugins\/post.php?href=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.facebook.com%2FandyhillMKM%2Fposts%2F250343965393592&width=500\" width=\"500\" height=\"316\" frameborder=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\"><\/iframe><\/figure>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p>La La Land was an uplifting choice given our current state and the songs became some major ear worms for the next week. \u00a0I'd recommend it!<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p>Even though our date night was short, it was crucial. Lately, we don't spend enough time together without our kids. We were able to talk without being interrupted at dinner and most importantly we were able to focus on each other instead of attending to every small need of our kids.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p>Good start for day 1 &#8230;<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span style=\"color: #ff6600;\">Day 2: \u00a0Breakfast in Bed<\/span><\/h3>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p>What better way to show your appreciation for someone who works so hard for your family than breakfast in bed? It's the ultimate luxury!<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"wp-image-710\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/marriagekidsandmoney.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/01\/IMG_7901.jpg?resize=300%2C225&#038;ssl=1\" alt=\"\" data-recalc-dims=\"1\" \/><\/figure>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p>On the morning of day two, I whipped up some eggs, toast with avocado spread, bacon and her favorite <a href=\"https:\/\/www.amazon.com\/gp\/product\/B00MANEKWY\/ref=as_li_qf_sp_asin_il_tl?ie=UTF8&tag=marri05-20&camp=1789&creative=9325&linkCode=as2&creativeASIN=B00MANEKWY&linkId=b8402434fe18dc6e68f19653ee1da862\">Green Juice<\/a>. I snuck into the bedroom and I set it next to the bed with a note telling her I love her. The smell of bacon is a great way to wake up!<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p>This simple gesture took me less than 10 minutes and brought a smile to her beautiful face.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span style=\"color: #ff6600;\">Day 3: \u00a0Take an Unexpected To-Do Off of Her List<\/span><\/h3>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p>Like most all Stay-at-Home Moms, Nicole's to-do list is unending. Between the daily activities of making our\u00a0kids their food, changing Calvin's diapers and driving Zoey back and forth from school, she doesn't have enough hours in the day to do everything she wants to do.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p>So my goal for day 3 was taking something off of that list for her.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<div class=\"wp-block-image wp-image-713\">\r\n<figure class=\"alignright\"><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"wp-image-713\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/marriagekidsandmoney.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/01\/dirty-car-2.jpeg?resize=225%2C300&#038;ssl=1\" alt=\"\" data-recalc-dims=\"1\" \/>\r\n<figcaption>Hi Pikachu!<\/figcaption>\r\n<\/figure>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p>I decided I would tackle the destruction my kids left in her car.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p>I spent the next 20 minutes cleaning and vacuuming Nicole's\u00a0car. Cheerios, pretzels, Shopkins and Disney princess dolls all came out to say hello.\u00a0This is the car that carts our kids around town from Grandma's house to the library to school and everywhere in between. It collects a lot of kid artifacts.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<div class=\"wp-block-image wp-image-714\">\r\n<figure class=\"alignright\"><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"wp-image-714\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/marriagekidsandmoney.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/01\/clean-car.jpeg?resize=225%2C300&#038;ssl=1\" alt=\"\" data-recalc-dims=\"1\" \/>\r\n<figcaption>Bye Pikachu!<\/figcaption>\r\n<\/figure>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p>It's amazing what a Shop-Vac and a wet rag can do!<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p>This was only 1 of 100 things that Nicole completes in a day, but if this took an ounce of weight off\u00a0of her back then it was worth it.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p>Goal for Day 3 complete &#8230;<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span style=\"color: #ff6600;\">Day 4: \u00a0Help Her Start the\u00a0Week Off\u00a0Right<\/span><\/h3>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<div class=\"wp-block-image wp-image-716 size-medium\">\r\n<figure class=\"alignright\"><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"wp-image-716\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/marriagekidsandmoney.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/01\/Kids-Restaurant.jpeg?resize=225%2C300&#038;ssl=1\" alt=\"\" data-recalc-dims=\"1\" \/>\r\n<figcaption>Zoey and Calvin's Restaurant<\/figcaption>\r\n<\/figure>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p>On Sunday evening, our little monsters (I mean angels) tornadoed through the basement and left a gigantic mess. They were playing &#8220;restaurant&#8221; and serving each other fake plastic pieces of food. It was actually pretty cute. &#8220;Sir, would you like some more corn?&#8221;<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p>Nicole and I were both too exhausted to play\u00a0bus boy that night and clean up the &#8220;dishes&#8221; so we closed up the restaurant early and went to bed.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<div class=\"wp-block-image wp-image-718 size-medium\">\r\n<figure class=\"alignright\"><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"wp-image-718\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/marriagekidsandmoney.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/01\/Clean-Kids-Restaurant.jpeg?resize=225%2C300&#038;ssl=1\" alt=\"\" data-recalc-dims=\"1\" \/>\r\n<figcaption>Restaurant is closed.<\/figcaption>\r\n<\/figure>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p>When I came down to start my day the next morning, I walked into the basement and remembered the restaurant wreckage.<br \/>I went to work on cleaning up and getting the room back to normal. My goal was to make sure that Nicole's Monday morning started off on the right foot. With one less mess to clean, she could maybe, JUST maybe, have 5 minutes for herself on Day 4.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p>This is getting addicting.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span style=\"color: #ff6600;\">Day 5: \u00a0Write a Note of Appreciation<\/span><\/h3>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<div class=\"wp-block-image\">\r\n<figure class=\"alignright\"><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"wp-image-722\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/marriagekidsandmoney.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/01\/5-Reasons-I-Love-You.jpeg?resize=225%2C300&#038;ssl=1\" alt=\"\" data-recalc-dims=\"1\" \/><\/figure>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p>In the hustle and bustle of our crazy days, I don't find enough moments to tell my wife how much she means to me and why she is so important to me. I give her a kiss goodbye before I head out for work and I tell her that I love her almost every day, but I don't remember the last time I spent some real focused time thinking about WHY I love her.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p>On Day 5, I took 20 minutes out of my morning before heading to work to write down 5 reasons I love her. I wrote them on the white board so she would find it later in the day.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<ol>\r\n<li>Your unending love for our children.<\/li>\r\n<li>Your passion to create a more compassionate world.<\/li>\r\n<li>Your sharp wit and sense of humor.<\/li>\r\n<li>Your support in my endless adventures.<\/li>\r\n<li>Your selflessness when it comes to making our family the best it can be.<\/li>\r\n<\/ol>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p>It took her two days to notice\u00a0it\u00a0(note to self: send a text next time!), but she appreciated the kind words and it made her day a bit brighter.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span style=\"color: #ff6600;\">Day 6: \u00a0Give Her Freedom to Pursue Her\u00a0Passions<\/span><\/h3>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p>When you choose a life as a Stay-at-Home Mom you are making some major sacrifices. You are sacrificing your career, your ability to interact with adults on a daily basis and any chance to take a shower\u00a0in privacy again. I mean, seriously kids &#8230; a closed-door means something!<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p>Since she's sacrificing so much for our family, I wanted to take advantage of a moment to give her an ounce of her freedom back. She expressed an interest in going to the recent\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/www.womensmarch.com\/\">Women's March<\/a> in Washington. The goal of the march was to &#8220;stand together\u00a0in solidarity for the protection of our rights, our safety, our health, and our families &#8211; recognizing that our vibrant and diverse communities are the strength of our country.&#8221; I supported her interest in the effort and offered to watch the kids for the weekend.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p>In Washington and across the world, <a href=\"http:\/\/abcnews.go.com\/Politics\/womens-march-heads-washington-day-trumps-inauguration\/story?id=44936042\">over 1 million people<\/a>\u00a0rallied on Saturday\u00a0to show their support for peace, unity and the protection of human rights. Nicole was one of those million people and she's extremely proud to have been there.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<figure><iframe loading=\"lazy\" style=\"border: none; overflow: hidden;\" src=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/plugins\/post.php?href=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.facebook.com%2Fnicole.druschke.hill%2Fposts%2F10154540313223025&width=500\" width=\"500\" height=\"626\" frameborder=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\"><\/iframe><\/figure>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span style=\"color: #ff6600;\">Day 7: \u00a0Walk a Day in Her Shoes<\/span><\/h3>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p>There's no better way to get a TRUE appreciation for what your Stay-at-Home Mom goes through on a daily basis, than staying at home with the kids for a day. And man, when Nicole was gone in DC, I got a taste of it. I quickly realized how much easier my full-time job is than her full-time job.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p>Here's a summary of my day:<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p>Wake up. Make breakfast. Clean dishes. Get kids ready. Get them to gymnastics class on time. Make lunch. Clean more dishes. Put screaming child down for nap. Remember you haven't eaten. Eat your kids' unfinished food. Make dinner. Clean more dishes. Start laundry. Bath time. Story time. Put kids to sleep. Put kids to sleep again. Still not asleep?! Get frustrated and pull kids into bed with you. Pass out. Wake up with a small foot in your face.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p>I travel out-of-town for work quite a bit\u00a0so Nicole is in all-day single parent mode\u00a0quite frequently. My empathy and appreciation for her situation came rushing in on Saturday.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p>Thank you Nicole. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for all that you do for this family.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\" \/>\r\n\r\n\r\n<p>This 7-day challenge was a great exercise for me. And honestly, it wasn't that difficult. Given that, I'm going to do my best to make this week of activities a habit instead of a challenge.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p>She does goes the extra mile for Zoey, Calvin and I\u00a0every day. Why can't I?<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\">How\u00a0do you make your wife feel appreciated?<\/h3>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\">What else should\u00a0I do to make my wife smile?<\/h3>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<div style=\"display: none;\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/marriagekidsandmoney.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/01\/mom-feel-appreciated-mkm.png?w=1200&#038;ssl=1\" data-recalc-dims=\"1\" \/><\/div>\r\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Being a Stay-at-Home Mom can be incredibly difficult. Long days, no contact with adults and repetitive tasks that feel like rearranging the deck chairs on the Titanic can make you lose your marbles. Yes, it is incredibly rewarding and you develop an unbreakable bond with your children, but raising small kids can be physically, mentally [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":10221,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[13],"tags":[72,73,74,52,75,76],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v22.4 (Yoast SEO v22.5) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>How to Make a Stay-at-Home Mom Feel Appreciated in 1 Week<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Being a Stay-at-Home Mom can be stressful and emotionally draining. 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